bloom

as long as i can remember, i always craved rainy days.

i loved the way a good rainy day changed my mood, changed the way everything around me looked: the light was different, the colors changed.

i always loved listening to the rhythmic sound of the drops hitting the pavement and the smell of wet asphalt was among my favorite of all scents.

i loved having recess indoors, getting cozy at home, driving through puddles and having a reason to eat soup and warm bread with butter.

but this year, something has changed. like a sea change deep within me.

i want the sun.

and so different from the past, my face now falls when i read the news, forecasting days of more rain.

similar to my cravings for m&m's and pineapple, i yearn to lounge in the sun and feel the warmth on my skin. i want to get a few more freckles. i want to be barefoot. i want to open all the windows in our little house. i just want to be outside.

i wonder if this little summer baby berry growing inside me is to blame.

regardless, despite my disapproval with the continuing rain, i am reminded that each day is so fleeting and that as hard as it may be to believe now, someday soon, my craving for rain and winter may return. and that most certainly, someday long from now, i will miss this time, this month, this week, of my life. rain soaked and all.

but today, as the cold seems to permeate my bones and heavy clouds loom above, for comfort, a few times each hour, i steal a wistful glance at the tree outside my office window.

it has bloomed.

and somehow, through the rain, each bloom seems to promise me warm, sunny days ahead...